Happy Monday! I am praying for those of you who are in the path of Hurricane Sandy. May God keep you safe and dry…
Secondly, I would like to announce the winner of the “Get Real: Stop Hiding Behind the Mask” book drawing. And the winner is: JEANETTE EDGAR! Jeanette, please send me your mailing address via email and congratulations! Thanks to all who entered the drawing last week, and a big thank you to Jamy Whitaker, the author of “Get Real,” for her excellent post on the important topic of identity. You can purchase a copy of her book here.
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OCTOBER 20th: “There is a part of the sea known as “the cushion of the sea.” It lies beneath the surface that is agitated by storms and churned by the wind. It is so deep that it is a part of the sea that is never stirred. When the ocean floor in these deep places is dredged of the remains of plant or animal life, it reveals evidence of having remained completely undisturbed for hundreds, if not thousands, of years.
The peace of God is an eternal calm like the cushion of the sea. It lies so deeply within the human heart that no external difficulty or disturbance can reach it. And anyone who enters the presence of God becomes a partaker of that undisturbed and undisturbable calm.”
~Arthur Tappan Pierson, from Streams In The Desert, pages 395-396.
October 20th was the day we celebrated my mother’s life.
On the surface, tears fell as pictures of my mother flashed upon a screen. But all was calm and peaceful in my heart, my “cushion of the sea.”
“The peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” ~Philippians 4:7
This is what “transcends all understanding” looks like:
My precious father sharing memories of my mother while wearing a great looking tie and with a smile. I am so proud of him! Love you dad 🙂
Here I am sharing the final thank you card that my mother left for those in attendance that day. She loved to send cards…
“Transcends all understanding” was found in my smile as I spoke into the microphone. It was found in the sound of my laughter, when I reminisced with many of you afterward. Our family did not fall apart that day. Yes, we were sad. But the Spirit guarded us and we partook of the peace of God. We testified and I believe God was blessed…it was a moment of my life that was beyond my understanding.
It was beautiful.
Remember my flip flops? They were there too. I wore them to the family luncheon later that day 🙂
And now a week has passed.
Is my heart still calm?
Yes, it is well with my soul.
I have not had a lot to say during my times of reflection and prayer with the Lord. There haven’t been that many tears. I try to force them because I assume that that is what everyone expects.
Isn’t that what a loving daughter should do?
Yet, the tears will not come. My “cushion of the sea” remains undisturbed.
Grief cannot seem to reach it right now.
Why?
Because God is helping me to partake of His peace and comfort. Remember, this is what we have been praying for.
I sense that my Heavenly Father is saying to my heart: “Receive, Tracy. Receive my peace! This part of your journey is now over. We have gained much ground. There are parts of you that needed to be burned and broken. Rest and rejoice. It is over. Death is not the master.
I AM.
Let’s go further. I have more waiting for you…”
OCTOBER 20th: “When winds are raging o’er the upper ocean,
And waves are tossed wild with an angry roar,
It’s said, far down beneath the wild commotion,
That peaceful stillness reigns forevermore.
Far, far beneath, noise of tempests falls silent,
And silver waves lie ever peacefully,
And no storm, however fierce or violent,
Disturbs the Sabbath of that deeper sea.
So to the heart that knows Your love, O Father,
There is a temple sacred evermore,
And all life’s angry voices causing bother,
Die in hushed silence at its peaceful door.
Far, far away, the roars of strife fall silent,
And loving thoughts rise ever peacefully,
And no storm, however fierce or violent,
Disturbs the soul that dwells, O Lord, in Thee.”
~Harriet Beecher Stowe, from Streams In The Desert, page 396.
I am ready to go forward with God. The roars of strife are silent.
I am ready to keep sharing about how God is changing me, one degree at a time. However, before we go on, there is one more post I want to share with you in regards to the process of grieving that God has carried me through. I feel that the best format for me to do that will be via another video blog post. For those of you who have lost a loved one after watching them suffer for a season, or are about to lose a loved one, I would like to say something special to you. So stay tuned…
My dear friends, Jenet and Rachel, who traveled many miles to be with me and to celebrate Roxie’s victory 🙂
Tracy, what a testimony to God’s ability to sustain us during sadness and grief. Your mother’s life celebration was surely a fitting tribute to one who could smile at the days to come (Pr. 31). May you continue to rest in God’s goodness and comfort.
Thank you Amy. I will continue to rest in God’s arms. He has carried me this far and will carry me onwards and upwards (literally too, yes?). Praise Him! Blessings to you dear sister.
What a beautiful tribute not only to your mom but of God’s loving care. Your mom left a legacy that inspires me daily!!! And thank you for this post when I needed it so much – I need peace right now not from a death (although that too – it’s only been two weeks and we are still grieving) but for my son.
Dearest Veronica-I continue to lift you up, and will lift your son up as well. I pray that God’s comfort will overwhelm you, and for His strength and wisdom to be evident to you during this time. God bless. Isaiah 41:10
I love that you wore yellow to the celebration. Mary and I are considering what colors we will wear to our Mother’s celebration, maybe cobalt blue from Mary’s wedding. She also had an ice cream theme. You can check out her blog at icecreamconeeveryday@blogspot.com, so we thought we would do ice cream pins and have an ice cream bar….
Jane, I am so thankful that God crossed our paths. I am walking with you, and I love cobalt blue! How beautiful it is!I love the idea of ice cream pins/ice cream bars. What a wonderful celebration it will be. I will check out your sister’s blog. 🙂 Thank you for sharing your life/friendship with me. Praying, praying, praying for you…
The Celebration of Life for Roxie was beautiful! The pictures, the memories, the laughter, the tears. At one point, when your dad was talking about Roxie, I could almost hear her saying, “Now Wayne” and it brought a smile to my face. And there she was, at the end, singing with us all “In Christ Alone” as she nestled in His arms!
It was a joy seeing your dad at church yesterday – we talked about the Wildcats!
We will miss her dearly, until we are reunited in the Glory of the Great I AM.
Peace be with you dear Tracy.
Jo-It was wonderful to see you at the service. I bet Roxie would have rolled her eyes during my dad’s “doorbell” story. (chuckle) And yes, how about our Wildcats! They are giving us a lot to cheer about this season :). Thanks again for all your prayers and love. God bless and GO KSU!!!!!!!
I love you sister Tracy! Thank you for sharing here with us girl… “I Surrender All”, and “It Is Well With My Soul”, have been coming out of my mouth lately. ~ Blessings, Amy
Those are such beautiful songs Amy. In fact, in church yesterday we sang “It is Well with My Soul”…it really got me thinking, and hence this post. I could barely sing, but I stood and sang in my heart anyways. God knows and He is with me.
Blessings to you, and I hope you and your family are staying out of the path of the storm!
As I read your posting here, I thought of how I have changed through the years, as you say one degree at a time. The person I was ten years ago is much different than the person I am today and yet, the person I was yesterday is not who I am today either. As we each continue to spend time with our LORD, listen and follow we become more like HIM, which is what He wants for us.
Grief is very different for each of us, and your LORD is replacing what our society might call grief with HIS TOTAL PEACE in you! Love you greatly!
Praise God for how He is changing you Terry. Yes, you made a great point about grief being different for each of us. I will be addressing that in my next post…God has created us to be different, and the reasons for our grief vary greatly. As you know, we have been walking this road with my mother for 11 years. The peace and joy I am experiencing right now comes after 11 years. God and I have been through a lot to arrive at this place! I pray that my story proves that our God WILL provide comfort, peace, and joy to those who seek after Him, year after year. Thank you for all your prayers and for coming to the memorial service. Blessings 🙂