Missing billfolds and Bible Studies

 

I left my brain back in Bavaria.

Or, maybe young motherhood and sleep deprivation is taking a toll on my memory.

I don’t really know.

What I do know is that we were late to Bible study yesterday, and it was this mama’s fault.

 

 

The morning started off wonderful. I woke up earlier than usual. I prayed with passion. I actually showered, fixed my hair, and applied makeup to my smiling face. I fed and dressed my wiggly, giggly children with ease and grace. I filled and labeled their clean Sippy cups. I divided their fish crackers into equal amounts and lovingly placed them into the designated Ziploc baggies (which were also labeled).

I remembered to pack extra outfits, diapers, baby wipes, Jackson’s favorite cars and Katie’s princess blanket. My Bible, keys, cell phone, garage door opener, purse, and caffeinated beverage were easily located, organized and carried out to the car.

We were ready to go 30 minutes before we needed to leave.

Yep, I was feeling pretty awesome.

 

 

When it was time to leave, I calmly loaded Jack and Katie into their car seats and patiently fastened all 500 belts and latches on their beloved child safety seats. I hopped into the driver’s seat and began to dig in my purse for my sunglasses. THIS is when I noticed something.

My billfold containing my driver’s license and military ID (which allows me back on base and into our home) was gone.

I immediately began to, well… freak out internally:

Where did I last see my billfold?

What am I going to do?

I am Type-A and Type-A people don’t lose things!

Why couldn’t I have discovered this 30 minutes ago?

Maybe I shouldn’t go to Bible study now because I am going to be late…

God, how could I do this? Please help me! I am so angry and frustrated with myself… 

 

Perhaps you can relate. Some days are like this, aren’t they? We plan, prepare, and execute with ease and grace. We have life under control.

And then we mess up.

 

 

A One Degree Moment

Here is what the Holy Spirit revealed to me through the missing billfold fiasco:

I do not like being human all the time.

I do not enjoy being human all the time because it’s means I am going to tire, hurt, lose my patience, worry, and misplace things. Being human means I do not know all the answers.

Being human means that when my plans fail I will naturally question and put myself down. I will naturally feel confused, frustrated, or hopeless.  I will naturally want to turn around and go home because I am too embarrassed or ashamed to attend Bible study.

I am tired of doing life naturally.

I want to “do” life  supernaturally.

The only way I can do this is to yield to the Holy Spirit’s direction as He changes me one degree at a time (2 Corinthians 3:17-18 ESV). If He sees fit to use a missing billfold to accomplish this, then I will trust Him.

Thankfully, the Holy Spirit reminded me that I left my billfold in Chad’s car. He also reminded me that the world would not end if I walked into the study 20 minutes late. He gave me the strength to turn around and say, “Oops, mommy messed up” to my kids with a smile on my face.

I learned to show myself grace, to keep life in perspective, and to remain composed in front of my children. Jackson and Katie witnessed life lived supernaturally.

So friends, I pray that you are encouraged. You are not the only one who messes up. You and I are human. It is important for us to remind each other of this, and to cheer each other on as we live life “supernaturally” for the glory of God. Despite our mess ups, we are loved by our Abba Father.

Hold on loosely to your plans and hold on tightly to your God. All is not lost, even if you walk into Bible study late…

 

“Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand.”

~Proverbs 19:21 ESV

I am also excited to join in the Bad Mom Mondays and Woman to Woman ministries link ups today! I’d like to extend a warm welcome to those of you that are joining me from these groups.

 

 

*images courtesy of stockimages/freedigitalphotos.net