Screams on the plane: I am “that mom”

 

Whether on land,

 

If you were visiting Graceland back in April of 2009, intent on enjoying the music and home of Elvis Presley, but were unable to do so because there was a screaming baby on your tour, I apologize. It was then that my husband and I became those people for the first time. I tried frantically to calm my precious son, and I failed. I am sorry.

 

or in the sky,

 

If you were on Southwest flight #801 from Phoenix to San Antonio on February 19th, 2012, I apologize.

I apologize because I was that mom. I was the mom with the screaming baby. The one who could not get her toddler to stop screaming, remember me? We ruined your reading and relaxation time. You may feel I ruined your life. I know this, because I felt your stares and heard your sighs. I tried to quiet my princess, and I failed. I am sorry.

Before I had children, I would look down upon mothers who found themselves in similar situations. Now I am that mom. Some of you would call this karma. I call it love. God’s love, that is.

 

they will, at some point, cry.

 

istockphoto by AndyL

 

As I held my red faced screaming child, I became buried under an avalanche of emotions ranging from anger to embarrassment. I was angry at the experts and their failed “tot flying tips.” I became mentally consumed with questions such as:

• If I don’t stop the crying, will the other passengers hate me or beat me up once we enter the terminal?
• What if they think or tell me that I suck as a mom?

In a matter of seconds, it became all about me looking like the perfect mom. It became all about keeping everyone else happy with me.

As the screams continued I became snippy with my husband. Then I became impatient with my 3 year old son, who also started to cry. Now both kids were in orbit. And so it went, for another hour. Maybe it was more like 10 minutes. But it seemed like an hour. According to my husband, the entire fiasco lasted around 20 minutes. However long, those minutes revealed some “things” that had taken up residence in my heart over a longer period of time.

 

A matter of the heart:

 

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.”

~Proverbs 4:23 ESV

 

During the days that followed, I discovered a tendancy to worship other people and their opinions of me in my heart. I had not been keeping or guarding my heart as cautiously as I had thought. What spilled out of me and onto my husband and children was anything but “life” giving. Since then I have been doing some spring cleaning within my heart. I am thankful that:

• God’s mercies are new every morning. (Lamentations 3:22-23)
• God does not became anxious when I cry in His arms. (Matthew 11:28)
• the next time my child screams in public, I have the ability to handle those minutes in a way that honors God, because the Holy Spirit is in me. (Ephesians 1:13; Galatians 5:22-23)

 

In the end…

 

While trying to comfort both of my children, my son said, “Mommy, sing the Bible song to me.” (His Bible song is actually “Jesus loves me”) As he buried his wet little face into my neck, I started to sing. He immediately relaxed and ceased to cry. Katie continued to cry, but the more I sang, the more both of us relaxed. As I sang, Jesus ministered to me right there on the airplane amidst the snot and the stares. He was with me and saw me through until peace was restored to row 17.

The surrounding passengers also survived, and no one beat me up. As we left the plane, a woman said to me: “I have been in your shoes. I can tell you are a good mom, so hang in there.” And examples of God’s love just keep on coming…

 

Is your child still napping?

 

For further reflection:

Truth is: your baby or toddler is going to cry in public. Your adolescent child may mouth off to you in public. Reflect on how you would handle this. Are you afraid to shop or eat in a restaurant with you toddler because you fear that a tantrum may occur? Do you let your older child disobey you in public and remain silent in order to appear “cool?”

As a fellow mommy, I urge you to pay attention to what happens to you mentally and emotionally the next time you become “that mom.” What might your response reveal? Could impatience, selfishness, anger, pride, or a desire to people please be lurking around in that precious mommy heart of yours? If so, what should you do with it?

I welcome your thoughts. Feel free to share about a time when you became “that mom” in the comment section below.

I am praying for you, fellow mommy friend!