I’ve read through several debates surrounding the movie, 50 Shades of Grey. Some mothers plan to watch the film even though they will not allow their daughters anywhere near the books or upcoming movie.
I applaud these mothers for not allowing their girls to read or watch 50 Shades, but it troubles me that they’ve read it; anxious to view it on the big screen.
For if 50 Shades is purely fictional, and a beautiful “redemption” story then why not let your daughter watch it with you? If its sexual images will quickly exit your mind after the movie ends, then won’t these same images quickly leave her mind too?
A lot of people are saying this film is harmless. Why are you telling your daughter it is harmful?
There is a deeper reason explaining why you will not let your daughter see 50 Shades. There is a deeper reason we mamas should not watch the pornography and violence esteemed in this movie either.
And it is simply this~
God does not want the eyes of our daughters feasting on filth since He created them in His image and calls them to be holy. (Genesis 1:26-27, 1 Peter 1:15-16) Mamas, we must not forget that we are also daughters and image bearers of this same God. I do not believe He wants us to feast on filth even though our “freedom” and a movie rating allow us to do so.
So please stop.
You are called to be holy as your Heavenly Father is holy.
Saying one thing, but living out another angers, frustrates, and divides. Hypocrisy cripples our relationship with our daughter and our Heavenly Father.
The 1 thing I appreciate about this movie is that it makes me pause and reflect on my own integrity as a mother. I should not hide any of my choices from my daughter. I should not use a movie rating, or the “when you get older you’ll be able to handle it” excuse, as continual crutches either.
Fellow mamas, 50 Shades is giving me an opportunity to give my daughter my heart.
I wonder what my daughter would think and feel if I said: “I am not going to view this film because I wish for you to do the same. If this movie isn’t good enough for you, it isn’t good enough for me. I will lay aside my freedom to watch this, simply because I love you. I want my wishes for your actions to mimic the reality of my actions.”
“You are not allowed to see the movie, but I am going out to have fun and watch this movie. Someday you will understand.”
“Whoops, I didn’t intend for you to find this particular book under my bed or on my Kindle. Um, no you cannot read it even though I did.”
Which response esteems my daughter instead of making her feel inferior or incompetent? Which response promotes doing life together authentically versus doing life separate and falsely?
My prayer is that you feel prompted to pause and reflect if you still desire to watch this movie. We mamas must be intentional about possessing integrity, so our relationship with our daughter AND our Heavenly Father remains honest and holy. May we allow the Holy Spirit to show us if going to this movie opens the door of hypocrisy. And if He does, we must say NO to 50 Shades of Grey in front of our daughters and for our daughters.
That “someday,” when our daughter will understand why we viewed the movie but forbid her to do the same may never come. We may not have someday, but we still have today.
Esteem integrity over filth.
*This post is also running today over at Whatever Girls, a ministry for moms and their teen daughters.